5 Reasons Why I Love Traveling Alone

As a single guy, I frequently take trips solo. My friends aren't as adventurous as I am, so they aren't always gun-ho about flying across the world. That has created a dilemma for me. I want to see the world, try new foods, and experience new cultures. I could wait for someone to come with me on trips or I have to go on my own. I have chosen to do the later and I am not sorry for it. In the past 3 years, I have been to Asia, Europe and Africa all on my own.

Many people have written about the problems of traveling solo, but there are quite a few benefits. Here are my top 5 Reasons Why I Love Traveling Alone:

1) Freedom

One of the best benefits of traveling by yourself is freedom. There isn't anyone to share making decisions with. You want to stay at the Hyatt, no problem. Want to sleep in, eat at a particular restaurant, skip a monument, also no problem. By traveling by yourself, you are the main decision maker.

I like not having anyone to share decision making with. When I travel, I tend to go hardcore. I may leave the hotel at 9 am and might not get back to the hotel until 9 pm. Not everyone can go 12 hours with little to no break. With only me, I get to set the pace and what I want to see. Freedom has allowed me to visit places that I couldn't if I was traveling with a friend or two. For instance, a few years ago, I took a road trip throughout Virginia. I wanted to visit my fraternity's headquarters in Richmond. With no one else with me, I took a detour from my planned trip and visited the headquarters.

2) Peace

With no one to share decision making with, there is peace. When traveling with others, tension always tend to boil underneath. Some people can keep the tension underneath, never letting others know it exists. Not me. At some point, my emotions get the best of me and I vocalize my frustrations. Its one of my flaws.

When I travel by myself, I have no one to blame, but me. If something happens, I caused it. During my trip to Tokyo, I was alone and I was at peace. With peace, your senses are at their highest, because your mind is clear. You start to experience things that you would otherwise not feel, see, smell or touch; mostly due to your mind being somewhere else.

Having peace is an amazing thing on vacation.

3) Time With Yourself

Solo traveling is not easy. You are in a foreign place by yourself. Under these circumstances, there is a lot of time by yourself. For some, the silence is to much to handle. However, I love the feeling especially in foreign countries that you don’t speak or understand the language. For instance, in Mali, I made the decision to quit my job of 5+ years. I had struggled with the decision to resign for months. Always putting the decision off, because I was busy with something else. In Mali, I had no distractions. No cell phone, no internet, no friends, only me and my thoughts.

I had the same clarity in Tokyo. Outside a few conversations with fellow travelers, I spoke few words. One day, I maybe said 10 words, all of them while ordering food. That silence can give you the time needed to make major decisions or look back on a situation. In Tokyo, I had time to review 2012 and lay out goals for 2013. I don't think I would have had the time/lack of distractions to do this if I spent the holidays in Connecticut.

4) Plenty of Time To Read Books

I love to read books. Its a passion of mine that I don't get to do to often. My life in Washington, DC sometimes is hectic. I very rarely have time to sit down and read a book. Therefore, on vacations, I am a reading machine. Typically, I can knock out 5 to 6 books on a 7 day vacation.

When traveling by myself, I can read books anywhere I want: on airplanes, subway rides, park etc. Since I don't have a travel companion, I'm not being rude reading. Actually, I enjoy stopping in parks to read for 15 or 20 minutes. Its a nice way to break up a day of sightseeing. Another place I read a lot is at dinner. Without anyone to converse with, I can pull out a book between courses and read. Frequently, I get looks from other guests in the restaurant, but I don't pay much attention.

One of the down sides of my love of reading is that I pick up books constantly. I prefer the real book to an e-book. It something about the feel and smell of the book. Since I only really read on vacation, I amass lots of books. Anytime there is a used bookstore or a library sale, I tend to stop and buy books.

When I finish a book, I tend to leave them where ever I am. My books have been left on planes, subways, airport bathrooms, hotel rooms, park benches. I have no use for them after I am finished plus I need their space in my luggage for souvenirs. Here are some of the books waiting to be read:

5) The New Friends You Will Meet

When traveling by yourself, you are more likely to meet new people. Its logically. If you are traveling with another person or group of people, you tend to congregate with those you know. You can't do this traveling solo. It is only you. This opens you up to meet new people.

At some point, the silence is going to get to much. You are going to crave verbal human contact. In Japan, I went to a public bath. While chilling out in one of the springs, a gentlemen starting talking to me. Since I was one of the few white guys there and by myself, I was a prime target. For the next 30 minutes, I talk to my new friend. After getting over the uncomfortableness of being naked and having a conversation with a complete stranger, I actually enjoy talking to him. He told me about restaurants to try, places to visit outside of Tokyo, and a cheaper way to get to the airport. If I was traveling with a friend, I would not have had this opportunity to meet this stranger.

My public bath experience was similar to this minus the read cover-ups and males only:

www.nwsportsbeat.com

Overall, traveling solo is a very rewarding experience. I encourage everything to try traveling alone. Start small. Maybe an overnight or weekend in a different city in the US. After getting over being alone, you might just enjoy seeing the world by yourself.

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Solo Eating

Last week, I wrote about an article that talk about 8 Travel Goals for 2013. One of those goals was "travel more by yourself." As I stated in that post, I love traveling by myself. One of the benefits of traveling by yourself is to determine when, when and how you do things. 

On the other hand, one of the downsides of traveling by yourself is eating solo. Eating by yourself can be difficult. People are looking at you in the restaurant, "wondering why is he eating by himself" and time between courses seems like hours, not minutes. On my flight home from Chicago, I browsed the American Airlines in-flight magazine and they had a great article about eating solo, properly titled Dinner for One.

In the article, author Larry Olmsted, offers some great suggestions for eating by oneself. My favorite suggestions he offered was to eat at communal tables. "For those wanting a little more social interaction, communal tables, where parties of one or more are seated­ together at one large table are increasingly popular. These types of tables are also a way to garner valuable insight on your new surroundings if you happen to be traveling. Communal tables are great way of getting tips on where to eat, where to visit and most importantly where to drink. I try to sit at communal tables or chef bars any time I can. 

Another point Olmsted made is that by eating by yourself, you might get seated faster than a couple. I agree with Olmsted on this point. Many times I have gone to restaurants by myself and was seated within 10 minutes of arriving, even with hearing waits for two tops is close to 45 minutes. This is not to say that eating alone will always get you into the hottest restaurant faster than others. Your Mileage Will Vary.

If you are thinking of traveling by yourself, my tip for you is to try eating by yourself in your hometown. Try eating at a sit down restaurant. The first time is always the hardest after that each time afterwards get easier.

Happy Solo Traveling~~~

News Article: 8 Travel Resolutions for 2013

CNN has a great article (here) on 8 Travel Resolutions for 2013. Written by blogger Maureen Jenkins, Urban Travel Girl, who is a freelancer travel journalist based in Paris. This article really caught my attention, because Chris and I are putting together our own travel goals, at the moent(to be shared soon). After reading her article, I added two more goals to my own list. Here is her list of 8 goals, you should consider in 2013 and my own commentary on each:


    1.                 Take off on your own -- even if you're traveling with a group

I love traveling by myself. I personally like the silence; not having to talk to people and being alone with my thoughts. Also, I like to people watch and its easier by yourself. However, even when I am traveling with friends or family, I need "me time." Be it a walk in a park by myself or a nap, I need that time to decompress. If you have never traveled on your own, I say go for it. Start small, a weekend away in a city in the United States. Learn how to eat by yourself, which isn't an easy thing to do. (My suggestion is always sit at a bar to eat at the beginning  you can always strike up a conversation with someone). After you have done a weekend, try a few days before hitting a full week trip like mine recent one to Tokyo. Traveling by yourself might be something you like, but don't let the fear of the unknown stop you from doing it.

    2.                 Don't let the lack of a foreign language keep you at home.

This is one I need to work on. Tokyo was one of my first time going to a place that I did not know the language, not a single word. Before you leave, learning a few phrases to get you by. When you arrive, understand you will be at a disadvantage, but with patience and pointing to items, you will get by fine. There are hundreds of languages in the world, if you limited your travel to those countries that speak the language you speak...your travel list would be pretty short.

    3.                 Say you're not a "tour" or "cruise" person? Give one a shot.

I dislike tours. I don't like being rushed to one place or another. I hate schedules on vacation. All I want to plan is when I am arriving and when I am leaving. Everything else should be up in the air. However, I might try a cruise in 2013. If I want to complete my goal of visiting all 7 continents before 2015, I am going to have to get over my dislike of tours and cruises, as a cruise is the only easy way to get to Antarctica. Unless I decided to become a scientist and get a National Institute of Science grant to study the mating pattern of penguins in the next 3 years, so I will have to get over my dislike of cruising. 

    4.                 Don't be ashamed to fall back on what's familiar.

Its ok to stop at McDonald's abroad for a hamburg, just don't do it every day. In India and have a craving for Pizza, go for it. One meal out of a dozen will not ruin your vacation, its when all of your meals have been at McDonald's that you have a problem.

    5.                 Vow not to leave vacation days on the table.

I am working on this one. Its easy not use vacation time and have it roll over. Many of my friends  who work for Uncle Sam, are not taking vacation time and having it roll over. There goal is to cash-out in the end. Yes, I know the idea that if one takes vacation time, they are seen as a slacker in the eyes of a boss. The reality is that many studies have shown that works who take vacation time have better productivity. Also, you are only young once. Take your vacation time and visit a foreign country, because it will be much more difficult, when you have a wife, kids, a mortgage and a dog named Sam. (I don't have experience with this, but I can only imagine its true).

    6.                 Start a travel-specific savings account.

I have a travel savings account. Each year a percentage of my annual bonus goes into the account and I can spend it on travel throughout the year. All your travel expenses should come out of this account (ie annual fees for credit cards, mattress runs, mileage runs etc.) The savings account becomes a travel budget. Setting yourself a travel budget is important, because you can get caught up in the "game" and wind up spending yourself into debt. I have been meaning to do a post about the need for a travel budget, so expect one soon (especially after a frank conversation with my friend and coauthor Chris about the need for a budget.)

    7.                 Do at least ONE thing that scares you while you're on the road.

All I can say is AMEN to this one. Its something that I preach every time, I hear someone is going on vacation. Try something new to eat, go somewhere off the beaten bath or do something that is outside of your norm. On my trip to Tokyo, I went to a public bathhouse. Well, the rules at a bathhouses in Tokyo require you to be buck naked. Yes, I was naked with 500 other men. It was actually got liberating. On top of that, I treated myself to a pedicure, which consisted of hundreds of fish eating the dead-skin off my feet and legs (lets say it tickled.) Back to this goal, I actually believe you should do something out of your norm or different each day of your trip. When I vacation, I eat things I never would at home. The way I do it? I don't ask what I am eating until after I am finished . . . roasted pig ears, anyone?


    8.                 Don't let other people's fears keep you from going.

This one is key. My Jewish grandparents lament on how they have never visited Israel. Them not going to Israel is not because of money, but rather fear. I had many opportunities to go to Israel for free, but I never went because my grandparents talked me out of it. I was not scared to go, they were. Similarly, before I went to Niger, many people told me I should not go, because I could get kidnapped. I didn't let there fears stop me and I had a great time. At the Tokyo public bath, I struck up a conversation with a gentlemen named Mike (who went to school in Washington, DC before moving to Japan), and he was telling me how he wanted to go to Israel, but his GFs and his families told them not to. I was frank with him, I told him to go, but buy great travel insurance. If the security situation worsens before you leave, using the travel insurance to get your money back. Don't let other people dictate where you travel, you need to make your own decision. However, going back to goal # 7, if you are a worry wort - sometimes you need to do things that scary you, but still buy great travel insurance.

I think all 8 goals are perfect for all travels. Regardless, if you are beginner, an avid traveler or a points addict, I think each of these goals makes perfect sense for people who share the travel hobby. For example, if you only stay at chain hotels on vacation, why not try a B&B. (Yes, I know its about the points, but its also about the experience, lets not forget. Spending as much time as we do earning points, we must get something out of it) I am personally adding #3 & #5 to my list this year. #5 (vacation time) might be hard, since I am new to the industry and job, but I will just have to make it work. 

Have you started your goal list for 2013? Do any of these 8 goals make it on to your list?